My five tips to positive relationships....

One of the symbols I receive psychically and from my guides when giving relationship readings often is a symbol of a small flower in a plant pot. That symbol to me is a reminder that relationships can be looked at like a living thing. Something that requires nourishment, watering, feeding tending too and taking care of and even sometimes pruning and de-weeding.
Many times the difficulties and challenges that form in relationships focus around similar areas. I have given much  spiritual guidance over the years and although sometimes two people aren't destined to be linked...(I am a firm follower of the “ a season, a reason or a lifetime philosophy)

I am also a follower that through making positive choices and having a positive focus both on a spiritual and general  level we can be more in control of our destiny. These 5 tips were given to me through meditation and spiritual inspiration and I hope they can be of use to you.

#tip1 Use your lips….

Are so quick to get the last word in?  Do you always feel the need to be pointing out the things he or she does wrong?
How we communicate and the time we spend communicating with people can really affect the dynamic of the relationship we have with them…
The stereotypical ‘nagging wife’ and ‘ ignorant closed up husband’ stereotypes can come to mind but we aren’t living in years of yonder or the dark ages.

Communication is everywhere and an important part of life....
Nature communicates with us all the time with the changing of weather and seasons. Technology communicates with us via TV, Mobiles, social app’s even printed posters, billboards, radio etc.

Our own psychic awareness and links with the spiritual and through mediumship is all communication in some form or fashion.

A positive relationship requires positive communication. Positive communication isn’t about ignoring the issues and not discussing the problems but by dealing with them in a balanced way, spending as much time ‘discussing/ talking it through’ as you do ‘ complimenting, thanking, appreciating, and loving’ the other person.
Find something good, kind and positive to say to them, use your manners, appreciate them verbally. Use your lips not just for a physical kiss but a verbal one to.
If you have issues talk them through and if the emotions are too high to actually talk it through in a way that will get progress try writing it down for each other to read.

Also think about others who you talk to, if you have that one friend you can chat to who hasn’t got loose lips great but otherwise limit the amount you discuss about your relationship issues elsewhere. Many turn to me as a psychic for that very reason, I am an outside source who isn’t going to blabber or judge you or them on your issues. Not many people be grudge a spiritual or psychic consult but they do be grudge the next time turning up to a family event and looking in the eyes of your family members who all know the ins and outs of your relationship and your partner is now faced with sitting opposite the sister you told all your issues to trying her best not to give him disapproving looks over the turkey roast….
Make a point of trying to understand your partners side and ensuring they understand yours, forgive and discuss issues productively.

Find middle ground to work on, some situations it took a while to get into and they wont be resolved in one conversation, but a few positive chats.

#tip2 Equality for all!

We hear the cries of equality from everywhere and as a spiritually open and humanity focussed society we grant the equality as best we can. But what about when it comes to our relationships?

Do we take equal responsibility?

Do we over power our partner or have too much responsibility?

A relationship needs a foundation of equality, now you can build a relationship on new or old values and traditions and I have even discussed relationships with polyamourous couples..

(Those in relationships which involve more than one person with all parties in EQUAL agreement)

I have even seen how some in open relationships have continued to flourish for years and years and even married and remained open but I have also seen the opposite and the same goes for traditional relationships.
If you want to be the bread winner and your partner wants to be the house husband/wife then it can work as long as it is a balanced and equal relationship.
When one of you takes on too much responsibility and when the other one of you takes on or is given too much blame things get messy. A positive relationship is built on equal respect, responsibility and love no matter the actual dynamic of the relationship even those in the more sexually open and explorative relationships are still built on mutual respect and equality.
Neither partner should have all the work or all the responsibility. Is your relationship out of balance and want to make changes? Do they even realise? Don’t let it fester like a weed in your flower pot..

#tip3 NEWSFLASH….RIP Romance..

If the romance is dead.. So to will be your relationship and before you get the hump  with me just listen .........romance comes in all shapes and forms and it can take a while to really get to know the person your with.
Not everyone wants a walk down the beach holding hands or dinner by candle light.
But affection, and romantic gesture is important in a positive relationship it breeds positive energy. If the person your with is unsure what to do for you write down some suggestions for them and let them surprise you and pick something for you.
Make time each week for a date or at least each month, and it need not be anything that breaks the bank. Again if unsure look into the partner, I have found sometimes that the astrological sign connected to someone can give some ideas to their general interests and you can build from there.
Make notes of the little things they say they like and the music they listen to…
Feed a positive relationship with positive action. Get the music on, the dvd in and if your not a cook, get the takeaway menus out.

#tip4 Available- A Spacious relationship - cosy enough for two…

Hello you, that’s the you from before you met the love of your life and devoted every day and minute to what they enjoyed and liked and love…
Can you be too clingy? I know I was in the past so then this tip is for you and for me too… space!!!.
They need it, you need it we all need it. A positive relationship is built on time together, and time apart.

Make sure to get some hobbies and interests of your own that work for you and ones that work just for them and then some things you can do together. A life of “same ‘ol, same ‘ol” can be boring.

Boredom breeds contempt.

Some are blessed enough to find the person they are happy to spend 24/7 with and there partner truly feels the same but on a 99% average most people can be in love and also find time for themselves without becoming selfish and self centred. And I have seen and found most relationships need it.

We each need time to our self to develop and grow and to follow our own hobbies. When the relationship becomes the everything in your life it can be too much to hold on to and maintain.
A positive relationship is one that is both spacious and cosy. Perhaps they go out with their friends and you meet up with yours for lunch ...separately , and then spend dinner and the evening just the two of you.
Absence can make the heart grow fonder but it also stops the relationship from dullness and boredom. Try each year to do something new, taste new food, visit a new place, have your favourites but also try new things together and apart.

#tip5 Adaptable to change

The person you are is more than likely different to the person you was perhaps 5 to ten years ago. We change work, home, personal life. People come in and out of our life, our goals and dreams can change too.

So when being in relationship with someone you can build the relationship on similar goals but also those goals and things can change.

Your partner might change career or you might change clothing style, or develop your psychic awareness or even both decide to move home, or move in together..
For a positive relationship you need to be adaptable to change, the seasons change all around us, the natural world changes, changes are inevitable so we need to learn to adapt to them.
I know that sometimes the person your with makes negative choices and changes in ways that make the situation negative and it isn’t possible to maintain a relationship. But this tip is for those more general changes.
With changes many of us seek guidance, what could the change bring?
Sometimes we need to make changes in career, house moves and even developing our own psychic awareness can bring in positive changes, but it is also very positive to ensure your adaptable too. What if your partner tells you their looking to change career? Some people ask guidance on their partners changes and what that can mean for the relationship and are you going to be adaptable to the change which could be very positive for you both..

Be like a sturdy but flexible tree. Have you relationship strongly rooted but adaptable to changes and flexible if any storms come along..